It’s time for MISSED CONNECTIONS – With the POWER of The Bull, we feel we’re uniquely qualified to help those who weren’t able to make their love connection happen. And Today we have some PICTURE PERFECT Examples with these postings on Craig’s List…
GEORGE: A woman with great knowledge, I’m generous – (Houston)
“I’m a generous guy looking for a woman that can provide great KNOWLEDGE.” (you know because so many people come to “Missed Connections” seeking great knowledge). “I’m attractive, athletic and disease free.
Reply – with face and full body pictures PLEASE, Ladies only. I’m also mobile…”
MO: BIG TEX (Rodeo Houston)
This girl learned missed connections the hard way. She started off innocently enough. She said…
“I dubbed you Big Tex during the Aaron Watson show at Rodeo Houston, as you are incredibly tall, handsome, long hair, great beard, white hat and blue paisley shirt. We locked eyes multiple times as you had to walk by me every time you needed a beer. I’m sorry I didn’t have the nerve to say hey, but I kinda hoped you were going to.”
Update: does this mention anywhere that I want INAPPROPRIATE pics?!! NO, IT DOESN’T!!!! SO STOP SENDING THEM!!!!
Mo: GIRLFRIEND…This is where we like to step-in and help you. Can we please innocently enough find her, her Big Tex, please?
COWBOY DAVE: Cowboy Napper (Rodeo Houston)
I heard a late night kick on my door on Saturday night, so I grabbed my pistol and went to look… and there you were, passed out… drunk, after Alan Jackson. I went out to investigate and it was like God pulled your mouth open like a horse trough and filled you with beer and tequila shots, then dropped you on my front porch perfectly wrapped in starched wranglers, a 20X pearl snap and 1 Lucchese boot. I really wanted to talk to you but you seemed shy. Shy or stuck up, not sure which since you didn’t even react when I pulled your hair and poked you with my BBQ prod. If you happen to see this and remember passing out cold on my porch last night, please feel free to message me if you felt something too. Just tell me what your ankles smell like now. I spent an hour rubbing coconut oil on your hairless, yellow lower calves and ankle on the foot that was missing the boot. Hope you hobbled home safely… I miss you!